It was slow (Sunday mornings are incredibly slow until 10:30 or 11) and I was sitting on the counter, playing a game (2048, because I am obsessed) on my phone. My co-worker was in back, doing paperwork.
This guy who was there yesterday morning comes in, and I get up off the counter, say hello, and walk to the register. Yesterday, he commented on my co-worker’s butt. Today, he walks in and says “Get off your ass and make some coffee.” I ignore it and take his order, make his drink (tall vanilla bean, hot, mostly 2% with a little half-and-half,) don’t make a lot of conversation with him, and then he left.
I don’t know what compelled him to say that. It bothered me, for sure. I’m not sure if he thought it was funny, or if he generally likes to be shitty to people (or maybe just to women) in service jobs, or what.
It would have been funny if one of my friends, somebody who I’d known for years said it. If Derek had said that, it could have been funny (Derek, I really can’t imagine you saying that.)
It wasn’t funny, or cute. It was just gross.
"My response to the “I am not a feminist” internet phenomenon….
First of all, it’s clear you don’t know what feminism is. But I’m not going to explain it to you. You can google it. To quote an old friend, “I’m not the feminist babysitter.”
But here is what I think you should know.
You’re insulting every woman who was forcibly restrained in a jail cell with a feeding tube down her throat for your right to vote, less than 100 years ago.
You’re degrading every woman who has accessed a rape crisis center, which wouldn’t exist without the feminist movement.
You’re undermining every woman who fought to make marital rape a crime (it was legal until 1993).
You’re spitting on the legacy of every woman who fought for women to be allowed to own property (1848). For the abolition of slavery and the rise of the labor union. For the right to divorce. For women to be allowed to have access to birth control (Comstock laws). For middle and upper class women to be allowed to work outside the home (poor women have always worked outside the home). To make domestic violence a crime in the US (It is very much legal in many parts of the world). To make workplace sexual harassment a crime.
In short, you know not what you speak of. You reap the rewards of these women’s sacrifices every day of your life. When you grin with your cutsey sign about how you’re not a feminist, you ignorantly spit on the sacred struggle of the past 200 years. You bite the hand that has fed you freedom, safety, and a voice.
In short, kiss my ass, you ignorant little jerks.”